The Secret is to Listen to Yourself

So much left unsaid to oneself is so much left undone.

Aimée Sparrow


Pixabay License

To find out what we have to do to improve our mood, our happiness, our fulfillment, and our satisfaction comes right down to listening to ourselves. We all know what we need to feel better. We just hide it to avoid shame or judgment as pain in our bodies.

Our daily lives do not need to give us discomfort, inconvenience, and recurring sadness, nor do we need to suppress fear or anger in order to move along with our days. Doing so only causes sadness, despondency, and depression.

While reading a book on neuro-linguistic programming, Neuro-Discipline: Everyday Neuroscience for Self-Discipline, Focus, and Defeating Your Brain’s Impulsive and Distracted Nature by Peter Hollins, I came to the conclusion that if I don’t make my thoughts heard, I will never really be seen and none of my problems will be solved.

It’s unfortunate how many of us go through life facing resistance and then we take the passive approach and avoid addressing the root cause of our difficulties. Generally, there is a solution to every problem if we develop clarity and motivation to seek help and fix it.

You’ll be surprised what you will find when you simply listen to what your mind has to say to you. You can do this by thinking about the reason you had a dream at night. You can also free-write to get all those thoughts and frustrations out.

Perhaps you are stubborn and feel as though things should go your way and if they don’t then it’s a failure on your side. Then, you do not address any of those supposed failures and continue struggling. That doesn’t serve anyone let alone yourself. The secret to wellness is first to acknowledge yourself and the basic needs you deserve to have met.

Step by step we can determine which actions to take. If we have the ability to address a problem and a path toward resolution, and if we need that extra boost or some help from an outside source, our thoughts will give us clarity on what to do next.

Our brains work in a specific way that isn’t conducive to long-term solutions to the everyday struggles and problems we face. We can’t change the way our brains work, but we can work along with our brains to adjust our reactions, expectations, and perceived choices.

Finally, with enough practice, we can alter our habits, address difficult issues, and do what’s best for us. A problem is only a problem if we keep our struggle to ourselves. Once we begin talking about it and then really analyzing our beliefs and reactions, will we begin to realize what is true, what is rational, and what needs to be done.

Aimee Sparrow is an author, applied philosopher, and mathematician who has been living with a mood disorder for more than a decade and advocates for happiness and inner peace. She is the author of Lunacy. Follow her website for more details.



Aimée Sparrow

An explorer of the philosophy behind psychology and what we dream to inspire peace and solace from suffering.